Or variations of that…like “What are you doing today?” or “What are your plans for today?”
I used to feel awkward – A LOT! – with questions like those.
When asked what I did, I always felt as if I were starring in a spy movie and I was the impostor. I never really took myself seriously – and so it would be as if I were asking myself the question all over again – “so exactly WHAT do YOU do Giselle?”
I berated myself for always choosing something else, that was the ‘sure thing’ – and then not sticking with it long enough. This was evidenced by a new question posed “so what are you doing NOW?”
Then I found myself taking in front, as we say here in Trinidad, and TELLING anyone who cared to listen – ALL the stuff I had to do on any particular day. And if asked the question “What are you doing or have planned for today?” – if I didn’t have anything – I’d make up something and then secretly feel ashamed of myself that I was not being productive and that of course there was an entire Universe of production surrounding me – and I was the only lazy person on the planet!
Journaling has brought some sense of balance to this entire situation of questions in this particular productivity genre.
I realized just this morning that I am NOT my to-do list. Having a long or equally short one does not increase or decrease my self-worth!
What IS important is that I have some mission in my life – a purpose – a burning desire to make a difference.
What matters is that I have a couple of goals, that I could revisit in the morning that would keep me focused and guide my choices during any given day.
What will keep me sane, AND GROUNDED, is to stop looking at other people’s lives and assuming what’s going on ‘over there’ and of course stop comparing my life and myself to them.
So today I commit to just being a better Gis.
I welcome being asked “what I do?” because I am excited by the possibilities that my life’s work affords
And today I am happy to say that I am FREE of my to-do list and will no longer identify with it as an indicator or reflection of who I am!