Today’s title is from a book, written by David Leddick.

It’s an advice book on life, style and fashion.

In the book’s description he underscores that you need to make it your top priority to dig deep and find your own style and express it as freely as you would a work of art. As you work to discover your own style, you’ll also discover the meaning of life, and more important, the meaning of YOUR life.

Then he asks the following:

• Wished you were someone else?
• Struggled to fit in with the crowd at school, at work, or even at home?
• Said something hurtful to your beloved for no apparent reason?
• Regretted the choices you’ve made to stay safe and secure?

I never wished to be someone else entirely, but I have certainly had thoughts along the lines of “I wish I could be more like…” for whatever the reason a few of which he identified in his questions.

I did struggle to fit in – in school, work and at home. In fact I can say that I’ve never fit in. I’ve stopped trying for the most part but it still affects me – feeling like an outsider or perhaps an interloper.

I often say things that I regret and as an overthinker, chew on for days after, analyzing why I said what I said, and what could I have done differently and that last one – boy oh boy. I have definitely made choices that were in retrospect, harmful to my mental health and creative spirit; keeping me wound tight and mechanical, cocooned in, what would seem to any onlooker, a safe and secure environment.

Conformity and fitting in drowns our individual style and approach to life and by life I mean everything in it – your vocation, you as a parent, you as part of a team, you working for yourself – EVERYTHING! You simply cannot be your full-bodied creative self while trying to do the right thing, say the right thing and be accepted.

Far too many of us are allowing people who don’t know what’s best for us, dictate what’s best for us. We are engaged in projects where the client hired us for our expertise, yet wants to tell us what to do. We are too afraid to say “no” I won’t be doing it that way or following that path because I strongly feel that this is what we should be doing and why.

Inside of it all is a lack of confidence and trust in who we are because we’ve not spent enough time getting to know ourselves.

We are too busy perfecting a game that by its very nature, is rigged where we lose and as a consequence, the world loses because we live with our gifts unopened, and unused – paying the ultimate price with our individuality.

If you are struggling in your expertise-based business you might be out of alignment with who you are and that screws up everything else. Consider getting a reset. Click here to find out how.