This morning I attended an Emotional Intelligence event hosted by Judy Joseph Mc Sween at Brix Hotel.

The room brought together a remarkably diverse group of people, including school leaders, members of the military, clergy, professionals from law, banking, and information technology, business owners, consultants, and individuals whose work is centred on caring for families and managing households. While their professional worlds could hardly have been more different, everyone spent the morning exploring a common subject: the role emotions play in our lives.

Through a series of Six Seconds Emotional Intelligence exercises, we were invited to reflect on three themes: knowing yourself, giving yourself, and choosing yourself.

The exercises required us to identify emotions, talk about them openly, and consider how they influence the way we experience the world. Some of the conversations were deeply personal. Others were practical. Many revealed how differently people can understand the same experience.

I am writing this late in the evening and I am still processing the day. What has stayed with me is not a particular exercise or even a specific conversation. It is a question that surfaced somewhere along the way.

Does emotional intelligence affect decision making?

At first the answer appears obvious. Of course it does. Yet the more I considered it, the less interested I became in the decisions themselves and the more interested I became in the person making them.

We often evaluate decisions by examining facts, risks, options, consequences, and outcomes. Those things matter. Yet every decision is being made by a human being carrying a unique collection of experiences, disappointments, fears, hopes, responsibilities, expectations, loyalties, and assumptions.

Two people can encounter the same situation and walk away with entirely different interpretations of what happened and what should happen next.

As I listened to participants throughout the morning, I found myself wondering whether many decisions are influenced way before a choice is consciously made.

The way we interpret a conversation, respond to uncertainty, experience criticism, define responsibility, or react to disappointment may all shape the lens through which we view a situation. By the time a decision appears in front of us, we may already be responding to a version of reality that has been filtered through our emotions, whether we recognize it or not.

For someone whose work revolves around helping leaders understand situations before deciding what to do next, that possibility feels significant. Much attention is given to improving decision-making frameworks, decision-making models, and decision-making processes. Far less attention is given to understanding the person who is using them.

Perhaps emotional intelligence contributes something important before any decision is ever made. Perhaps it helps us understand ourselves well enough to recognize how we are interpreting situations we face on a daily basis.

Strategic Reflection:

Think about an important decision you are currently facing. How much attention have you given to understanding yourself in relation to that decision, not just the decision itself?

About Giselle

I’m Giselle Hudson, a Pre-Decision Diagnostic Advisor. I work with leaders who are trying to make sense of a situation before deciding what to do next. Sometimes growth has stalled. Sometimes a team isn’t responding as expected. Sometimes an important decision feels far less clear than it first appeared.

My role is to help leaders examine what they are seeing, what they may be missing, and what questions still need answering before action is taken.

If you’re facing a situation that feels uncertain, complex, or difficult to interpret, don’t rush the next decision. Take the time to understand what you’re actually dealing with…