There comes a time in ones life when you have to start telling yourself the truth. All the things you keep SAYING you REALLY WANT – do you REALLY WANT them or have they become like lines in a familiar song that you repeat over and over because you’ve grown accustomed to hearing it enough times that it’s stuck in your head but connected to nothing that really moves you? In other words, the WHAT you say you want – does it have life, energy, vitality? Is it living inside you or is it just a series of dormant lines that you can’t unlearn? Or does what you REALLY WANT seem scary to you because it suggests having to give up other stuff that you quite enjoy?
No one can provide answers to these questions. We must all decide for ourselves. If you’ve been toting your wants for a long time – you said you wanted this particular thing, lifestyle, salary or whatever and the years are rolling by and you’re no where nearer to it – it’s time to draw a line and ask yourself if you wish to continue WANTING this particular thing. If your answer is YES then realize that SAYING that you REALLY WANT it is NOT ENOUGH.
You have to find ways to make this thing a part of who you are – a living breathing part. It must be front and centre at all times where your daily activities revolve around its achievement; where all you think about is your GETTING that which you desire.
If you’re like me and you’re tired of hearing yourself SAY you WANT stuff but your RESULTS show otherwise then take heart. Consider today’s message a call to reconsider everything you SAY you WANT. Do you really want these things? Why do you want them? Is it because it SOUNDS good? Is it because you feel an inner stirring toward going after this particular thing? Is it because you want the approval of your peer group/fraternity? Is it because you want to appear bright and knowledgeable to others? Is it because you want to be admired?
I’m realizing that it REALLY doesn’t matter who approves, applauds or acknowledges. It DOES matter how YOU FEEL. No one knows better than you. You deserve to give yourself that chance. You might fail. You can start over. Your approach may not work the first or second time, heck even the fifth time. Stoke the fires and keep doing, going in the direction of that which you desire.
Start paying attention to your desire for perfection. Start observing how you distract yourself. St Augustine tells us that it is the function of perfection to make us aware of our imperfections. Don’t run from your imperfections. Welcome them. Look for the lesson. Talk to your distractions. Unearth the real motivation behind not wanting to move forward. Be compassionate.
My greatest desire is to teach. To guide others through the three steps to knowing and understanding themselves through:
- Self Awareness
- Self Acceptance
- and Self Reliance
Max Wellspring says “In the face of the confusing nature of change, I think there is a deep longing for many of us in the human experience to feel safe. This search for safety manifests in a variety of ways. We yearn to know we have hit the mark in aligning with our true life purpose. We hope that we will reach some mythical state of accomplished perfection. We are certain that, after life changing experiences or periods of introspection or taking courses, listening to seminars and reading a library of books to get to know ourselves better and create what we want, we can put a fork in it and call ourselves “done”.
When we Rediscover WHO WE ARE we can trust ourselves more and learn to listen to the inner guidance that emanates from within…confidently. When we understand how to identify, isolate and eliminate those constraints holding us back from achieving our goals then we can feel confident in the NEXT steps we need to take. This is the safety we all seek – that inner knowing that EVERYTHING we experience in this life is conspiring for our good.
Despite my inner knowing that this is what I’m destined to do I remain afraid. I question myself. I doubt. I compare. I tell myself that I am not capable of teaching anyone anything because I struggle and I’m not yet perfect. The question remains – would staying behind the scenes working on becoming a PERFECT human being serve my greatest desire? I think not.
Recently my friend Sally-Ann posted this on my Facebook page – “Your process isn’t going to look like everyone else’s so stop comparing. They’re not going where you’re going.”
I wrote it in my journal but perhaps I need to engrave it in my brain by writing it out in long hand every day. We need to remind ourselves of what we want and where we’re going because no one else is going there but us. Have faith that you’re on the right track and trust that if you’re NOT, the Universe will course correct. The Universe won’t course correct however for those things you aspire to that are fueled by “they” or some other thing external to your inner drive. Your work in this case would be to tap into those things that DO MATTER to you and you alone, for reasons only you would understand and start from there.
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