Tag Archives: passion

A Change in Business Starts with a Change of Heart – YOURS!

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Published in the Business Newsday Thursday May 17th 2012

“You see what I have to deal with?” one business owner said to me recently, frustrated with an employee who was struggling with what he figured was a simple arithmetic problem. I empathised, shook my head and returned to the crux of our discussion.

Lately I find I am seeing more of what’s wrong than witnessing what’s going good in businesses. I’ve transformed from a “good” finder, that Zig Ziglar asks all of us to be and have become a “problem discoverer” kind of like the dog whisperer but not as sexy or charming!

Of course if I didn’t see challenges faced by businesses I’d be out of work…there’d be no need to consult with or seek my coaching guidance.

What I’m talking about though is not just identifying the need but constantly seeing the flaws and the faults as if playing some kind of game where the person who spots the most deficiencies wins.

Does this kind of approach work though? Just as bestselling author Mike Litman has said many times over in his audio presentation “Greatness Held Hostage” let me end this short paragraph with his phrase “who does it help and who does it serve?”

The answer to both questions is of course “no one.” Now that we’ve accurately identified all that’s wrong: what now – what next? Do we resign and say “you see what I have to put up with?” without figuring out how we can rectify the situation?

A friend of mine called recently to share with me a telephone conversation she had with one of these sky box companies. She was asking the customer service representative if by chance they were going to be opened on the Saturday before Mother’s Day (asking this only because she remembered them doing so in the past.) The customer service representative told her “no” and when she said that she knows for a fact that they had opened before in a similar case on a Saturday, the representative raised her voice and again said only one word “NO!” But this time with the voice of “how dare you question me, I’ve already said no!” My friend was in disbelief and then I asked what she thought was an important question: “how did someone with such a poor attitude get to be answering the phones on behalf of this company in the first place?”

This young lady may have been trained but how long ago? When last was she provided with any feedback on how she was doing on her job? Was she the right hire in the first place or was she just a square peg in a round hole feeling the pain on a daily basis of having to do a job she hates? Did she know what the company’s goals were, or understand the owner’s vision?

In order for any business to make changes you have to be prepared to look at things as they are but not worse than they are.  Quit engaging in constantly over-dramatizing your situation with stories of exasperation and frustration. This route will only ensure that you remain sans solution and doubtful that change is possible.

Check your heart. Not medically (although regular checkups are recommended) but check within to see how you truly feel about your business. Is your heart in it or have you lost all the fire and passion that got you started in the first place? If you find yourself just going through the motions, detached and uninvolved then STOP!

Take a mental health day. Away from the office of course! And nothing is going to happen. If things are already bad, they can get worse and they WILL if you keep doing business the way you are right now, disconnected and robotic. So take the time out for you and for the sake of saving your business.

Get back to basics. Decide what is important to you now. Don’t go down nostalgia lane, reminiscing about how good things were. The times have changed, your customers have changed, their problems have changed and you have changed. All these changes call for a completely different approach.

What does your business need to look and feel like NOW to solve your customer’s present day problems? Be very clear about your intentions. Now ask yourself “Do I truly believe that this is possible? That I am capable of seeing the changes through to the end where I am satisfied and my business is earning a profit again?” If you don’t fully believe it, keep selling yourself on your new ideas. If you are not sold then how are you going to lead the others in your business towards your new vision? They are going to hear your words but more importantly they are going to feel your conviction and if that is lukewarm there’ll be no buy in.

Get clear about you values and write out in long hand your new strategic direction. There’s something about putting pen to paper that makes a connection with your heart. This way not just your head will be involved but your heart will understand what you wish to accomplish as well.

Now you’re ready to get back in the game.

And please remember that if you continue fault and flaw finding, you will continue to make poor choices or worse – no choices and then you will not be the only one suffering. Your brand and your customers will be the victims of your poor choices as well so consider a change of heart. It may be exactly what you need right now to transform your business profitably.

“Without hard work, nothing grows but weeds.”

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I saw this quote by Gordon B. Hinckley and it literally grabbed me behind the ears and pulled me in. You see I’ve been attempting to develop a couple spots in my yard and hopefully one day be able to say that I have a garden and am gardening.

After a months holiday (December 2011 to January 2012) I returned to find quite a number of weeds in a tiny area that I created just for jump up and kiss me’s and in an area that I actually paid to have landscaped.

I set about one Saturday morning to try to salvage what I could, till the soil and replant the survivors.

Man was I proud! The very next day I saw a pink flower emerge and I smiled to myself. I’d done it! I have the green thumb just like my mother and my grandmother. I saved the plants. The other colors will emerge soon. Good job Gis! Mission accomplished!

Don’t ask me why I thought that my work was finished.

Yes, I knew I had to water the plants but the rainy season seemed to be upon us so I was comfortable.

As I came down my driveway yesterday I glanced at the jump up and kiss me bed and realized that I could not tell plant from weed. Didn’t I “just” weed this patch? “Just” of course being a month ago :) . It was evening so I waited until this morning to go see the condition of the bed.

This is what I saw…

My jump and kiss me bed is covered  with weeds. You mean I have to go pull them out again??!!!! I don’t want to. I want a bed of beautiful flowers.

But isn’t that how I treat my own life sometimes? Ok – MOST TIMES! :)

I do the “work” whatever that work is – one time and then think that this is all it would take to create lasting change. One shot at hard work and I’m done.

If however I don’t regularly pay attention and remove the weeds when they’re manageable, like once a week, then I am going to find that eventually the weeds WILL take over my garden. If I don’t pay attention to when the weeds reemerge in my own life (the habits that don’t help but hinder) and work at keeping the good habits in place so that my talents and passions (the beautiful flowers) are not crowded out then before I know it I would slip right back into behaviors that take me backward and towards becoming my best self.

So it’s back to weeding AGAIN! Of course I was a little dramatic and said that I would pull up everything and start over. But then I saw that there were still flowers and probably potential flowers that I am not seeing. So I will just keep what I have, weed today, and weed again in two weeks time.

And so it is with life. The flowers are an indication that we have done some work – we are making progress, replacing self defeating behaviors with more positive fulfilling ones. And while we continue to nurture those that we do see we must continue taking out the other weeds so that they don’t grow so profusely that we no longer see our gifts and lose hope in ourselves.

First jump and kiss me pic from http://www.caribbeangarden.blogspot.com the other two are from ‘ahem’ MY GARDEN! :)

 

People are NOT your most Important Asset. The RIGHT people are!

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Published in the Business Newsday Thursday May 10th 2012

“Despite all our gains in technology, product innovation and world markets, most people are not thriving in the organizations they work for. They are neither fulfilled nor excited. They are frustrated. They are not clear about where the organization is headed or what its highest priorities are. They are bogged down and distracted. Most of all, they don’t feel they can change much. Can you imagine the personal and organizational cost of failing to fully engage the passion, talent and intelligence of the workforce? It is far greater than all taxes, interest charges and labor costs put together!”

Sobering words from Stephen Covey in his book the 8th Habit yet oh so true and as relevant today, as when the book was first published in 2004. Perhaps the situation has got worse. I have no data to support this bar what I observe on a daily basis as I work with small businesses and the other stuff that I do in any given week – go to Hi-Lo, fill up with gas, go to the mall,  etc.

I see employees assemble dutifully at morning meetings and go through the motions, handling everything efficiently with expressionless faces and no passion. Cashiers cash. Gas station attendants fill cars up with gas. Vendors vend.

Are they doing as they ought? Of course! But they are almost robotic in their actions not trying to connect, build relationships, advance as a team…it’s as if when we arrive at work we are asked to leave our hearts at the door, pick them up on our way out as we clock our cards and wave goodbye to the place we must come to again tomorrow, not because we WANT to but we MUST.

In his book ‘God is a Salesman’ bestselling author Mark Stevens describes the usual versus the exceptional taking place in a furniture store. You walk into a furniture store and you could almost feel the sales associate eyeing you and then the well-practiced pounce –

Sales associate: “May I help you?”

You: “Perhaps. We need a kitchen table.”

Sales associate: “Very good. I’m sure I can help you. How much do you want to spend?”

This was of course “the usual” experience

Mark describes his exceptional experience this way “When my son and I walked into Kurt’s store on a snowy February, he asked if we’d been skiing earlier in the day.

‘Oh yes, perfect day on Mt. Mansfield.’ And then Kurt connected the dots. ‘And now you want to find the ideal table for those equally perfect après ski dinners with your family. Am I right?”

Mark: “Bingo”

Kurt: “Wonderful. I love to hear that. The greatest thing about skiing is the way it brings families together. You’re not really looking for a table, per se, you are seeking the ideal centerpiece for sitting down with the people you love and sharing stories of the great times you have together schussing down that mountain. All of the tables you see here would be great for that, but let me show you an antique table that captures the spirit of what you are after.”

Kurt had the gift, the insight and knew not to sell a product.

My question: Can we train for this behavior?

Winning organizations have figured that not any kind of person will do except if that person is RIGHT for your business. The right people are those who would exhibit desired behaviors anyway, as a natural extension of their character and attitude, regardless of any control and incentive system.

The challenges for most businesses is not to train all people to share your core values but to find people who already share those core values and to create mechanisms that so strongly reinforce those values that the people who don’t share them either never get hired or if they do, work their way out of the job i.e. decide to leave on their own.

Begin listening to the PAIN signals within your business. Do you regularly hear yourself or your employees say any of the following:

“I’m in a rut”

“I have no life; I am burned out and exhausted.”

“I’m not making a difference.”

“I’m stressed. Everyone wants EVERYTHING yesterday!”

“I’m here just killing time.”

“I’m sick and tired of all the backstabbing and politics in this place!”

Covey’s 8th Habit is about you finding your voice and helping others in your business find theirs. Sometimes their voice may not be the one you need in your choir. No matter how much training you provide they would not fit in. So the first step is to acknowledge that you are feeling pain and then begin to look for where you’re feeling that pain and finally take steps to heal.

This is a creative process. You can of course get great ideas by looking at what other businesses are doing but the best solutions are idiosyncratic adaptations. And remember not all solutions are to be created by your management team. Invite other members to participate in the ‘best solution find.’

Author John Gardner said “Most ailing organizations have developed a functional blindness to their own defects. They are not suffering because they cannot resolve their problems, but because they cannot SEE their problems.”

I’m hoping that you’re already seeing your challenges and if not feeling the painful effects of those challenges enough to do something about it!

Living a Life Without Regret

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This was yesterday’s topic on my Radio Series – Powerful Women – Live the Life You Love and Love the Life You Live every other Monday on Heartbeat radio for women (and the men who love them).

How can we live without regret? Listen to the show and then ask yourself :

“What is my heart saying to me, that I’ve been ignoring?”

“What excuses am I using to keep me stuck?”

“Am I really as comfortable as I keep saying I am?”

“What is the one small step that i can take towards making a positive change in my own favor?”

If you need help in taking “NEXT” Steps – don’t hesitate – book a FREE 45 minute Possibility to Profit™ Discovery Session today!


How to Find Your Life Force and the Human Being Inside the Well-Paid Executive

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I had the great pleasure of spending an hour with Larry Ackerman, founder of ‘The Identity Circle’. Larry feels that identity strength—how well you know 1) what makes you special and 2) what you will work to achieve no matter what obstacles get the way—is the key to your happiness. However, many of us lose contact with or never know what our “life force” is. We get busy doing other things, like surviving or focusing on what we think we should be doing.

Larry shared the following story with me. At the end, you’ll find an exercise to help you name your Life Force.

How can you succeed if you don’t know who you are?

After working hard for many years to be a success, you may stop one day and ask yourself who you are. You’ve had to leave your children in the hands of nannies, you’ve dressed for success, you’ve sacrificed your female intuition on the altar of marketing data, and you’ve brushed off sexual innuendos. Did you give up yourself in the process? Can you strip away the “shoulds” and define who you are when you feel fully alive and empowered?

Recovering one’s sense of self can seem like a daunting task. My friend Terry was a fighter. Terry had risen through the ranks of a well-respected health care organisation to become a vice president. Yet despite her seemingly successful career, she wasn’t happy.

Much of Terry’s drive to succeed had been trained into her as a child. With the best of intentions, her parents had insisted she follow a corporate career path. They believed that a traditional path was the only way to ensure Terry would be able to live independently, no matter what fate might bring.

At the age of 47, Terry developed a persistent, gnawing pain at the base of her stomach. After struggling to relieve the pain, she woke up one day with the realisation that the pain was telling her she needed to stop. She needed to stop working so hard and give herself the space to re-claim, as she put it, “the human being inside the well-paid executive” she’d worked so hard to become.

Terry courageously took herself on a path of self-discovery. In the months that followed, Terry’s emotions ran from elation to despair, but she was determined to clarify her identity — not simply as a woman; but as the unique individual she was. It took about four months, but Terry finally succeeded, coming to see that she was driven by one thing, one purpose, above all: to help people and organisations find the freedom to grow. This was Terry at her core; not Terry the executive, nor Terry the woman, but, simply, Terry the person.

Terry remained with her company, but many things changed. Re-energized, she joined the corporate innovation council, contributing new ideas for growth. At her request (and as strange as it may seem) internal communications now reports to Terry, so she has a direct connection with employees, which she relishes. Today, Terry promotes ‘identity conversations’ among her direct reports and encourages them to do the same with theirs.

Clarifying your identity — those unique characteristics that reveal your value-creating potential — can give you a fresh start on life, no matter how old you are, no matter what you have or haven’t accomplished, so far.

The process of identity discovery includes:

1. Start by defining yourself as separate from all others. Name the ways in which you are distinctly different from people you are closest to: your spouse/partner, parents, or best friend. Recognise that you’re not simply your labels, including your gender.

2. Unearth what you love. Identify four or five activities you love to do, such as skiing, cooking, travel, or horseback-riding. Then ask yourself why you love each. Once you’ve exhausted the ‘whys,’ look for patterns across these activities to see what themes emerge. These themes reveal what you really love and the innate capacities that are your greatest strengths.

3. Name the most important achievements of your life, beginning in childhood. What moments, large or small, have been most meaningful to you? Keep them simple and concrete. What is the pattern, or theme, that emerges among them all? It’s always there. Taking this step reveals your life force — the natural way you meet challenges and solve problems.

You can crack the code on your identity by combining the insights from these steps.

I have been working Larry’s steps to help define what I want to focus on in the next 10 years, which may be the last 10 years of my full-time career. I found it useful to give my life force a name or label. It could be as large as “breaking boundaries” or as sweet as “making connections.” See what comes up when you connect your dots.

When you allow yourself to focus on the force that fuels your life, you achieve amazing things that fill your heart not just your bank account. If this force is suppressed, you feel trapped or numb.

What is your life force?

Marcia Reynolds, Psy.D. is the bestselling author of Wander Woman: How High-Achieving Women Find Contentment and Direction. She is a professional coach and leadership trainer who teaches how to “outsmart your brain” to overcome challenges and find fulfilment on the road to success. Read more about her and her work at http://www.OutsmartYourBrain.com. What are the core ingredients that very few people know about that will help you take “NEXT” steps in your life? To find out send an email to womenleaderseries@gmail.com

Image from http://www.silverowhealingarts.com

“Oh no they can’t take that away from me…”

Posted in Developing the Possibilities Mindset, Practicing Self Mastery by

Today I needed to get a very simple job done: cut and make square a small piece of ply so that I could have an ‘armchair-makeshift-table’ to work on in lieu of sitting at a desk.

While waiting on the craftsman I had a look around his shop. In one corner was a huge bass that seemed to be in need of repair, there were spindles, some old furniture (there for refurbishing I guessed) and on his work table – some new cupboards. Needless to say I started to feel a little stupid with my ‘ply-cutting-squaring’ project but I sucked it up and said “Look – this is what you came to get done and that’s exactly what you are going to ask for with your head held high- no shame!”

Benji (the craftsman) with a cigarette dangling from his mouth asked me what I wanted and then asked me what I was going to use the ply for. He cut what I needed, made it square and then took his time to trim and sandpaper the edges, taking care of any loose splinters.

It took all of five minutes but I wasn’t yet ready to leave. You see the place reminded me of my Dad who was an avid wood worker – very talented I might add, and I helped him a lot. I went on to learn how to turn, on a lathe and even made a couple of items in my lifetime – a stool and a TV stand – the total couple.

I love the smell of wood shavings, varnish and lacquer. I love taking a raw piece of wood and turning it into something useful. I shared these thoughts with Benji. Time stood still as we connected around our love for wood work. He asked me about my dad’s tools. I really can’t say I know what happened to the tools after Dad passed. Benji told me he learned his trade from his dad, but when his dad passed, his father’s wife  (not his mom) sold the tools.

She may have sold the tools, but she couldn’t sell the talent he had and his ability to build a business doing what he loved, just as his father did!

And then I had this thought: Regardless of what we lose in life -  our love for a craft, our appreciation for good work, and our talents to execute and produce remarkable experiences and things could NEVER be taken away from us!

I also realized that life is one big school and sometimes in the very simplest of circumstances, we can learn something. Thank you Daniel Benjamin!

Photo of lathe from http://www.makeville.com

Dare to let go of the edge of yourself!

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Do you ever feel as if you’ve boxed your own self in?

Do you ever feel trapped inside your very own life?

Remember “The Truman Show” with Jim Carrey?

The movie is framed around the television show “The Truman Show.” Its main character, Truman Burbank, has lived his entire life since before birth in front of cameras for the show, though he himself is unaware of this fact.

Truman’s life is filmed through thousands of hidden cameras, 24 hours a day and broadcast live around the world, allowing executive producer Christof to capture Truman’s real emotion and human behavior when put in certain situations.

Truman’s hometown of Seahaven is a complete set built under a giant dome and populated by the show’s actors and crew, allowing Christof to control every aspect of Truman’s life, even the weather. To prevent Truman from discovering his false reality, Christof has invented means of dissuading his sense of exploration, including “killing” his father in a storm while on a fishing trip to instill in him a fear of the water, and making many news reports and ‘adverts’ about the dangers of travelling, and featuring television shows about how good it is to stay at home.

Without the help of an ‘external executive director’, haven’t we all single handedly invented our own means of dissuading our own sense of exploration? Haven’t we fought against our own inner urgings to do and be different by arguing with ourselves that our world as we know it is more comfortable and holds more truth than any possible worlds out there – outside ourselves?

Why are we so afraid to give way to passion? Why do we hold back? Why do we participate with just about 15% of who we REALLY are?

Ponder on these words by MARTHA GRAHAM, quoted by Agnes DeMille, in Martha: The Life and Work of Martha Graham [emphasis is mine]:

“There is vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open.”

Robert Essentham said it best…

Passion is truth on fire!

Remember that there is only one of you, and I’m remembering as I write this – that there is only one of me too! :)

And I agree with Martha. We all have talents and gifts that we alone can deliver in our own special way to those that need “our way” the most.

Think about how we are shortchanging the world by not being our best selves.

Truman finally discovered stairs that led to an EXIT sign and his own way out into the real world.

The question is – will we?